Apples and arcades

As though someone reached into my Somerset childhood and recreated it in bricks and mortar, I was extremely excited to discover Houston's latest, greatest addition: Cidercade. Yes, a warehouse filled with 275+ computer games where they also serve cider. With the Davies Summer School in full swing, where better to teach Pete about history, technology and...er...apples?

I gleefully handed over the $10 it costs for unlimited play, and slowly took in the majestic sight of so many arcade games! Over there was the Star Wars game I played in Florida when I was nine. In that corner was the four player Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles game that stole so much of my money on a school trip to Germany in the late 80s. Here was Street Fighter 2, which I was - and remain - rubbish at. Ahhh, the memories.

Pete was in his element, of course, with none of the cruel and unusual limits on his screen time. He was quickly drawn to a number of hunting games that involved plastic shotguns and computer-generated deer and ducks. Against my better judgement I was rather drawn in too. Better to do this in a computer than real life, I thought, and then realised this is the time-honoured argument used by kids to their shocked parents since the dawn of Pacman; cider helps take the edge off thorny ethical issues.

After three hours our rumbling tummies and sore feet told us it was time to go, only to discover you're allowed to bring your own food along and picnic in the arcade! That's for next time, but even in our weakened physical state it was hard to drag ourselves away. Computer games make everything better, cider makes everything better, and when the two combine an infinite positive feedback loop occurs. But (as I've maintained since my youth) does cider make me better at computer games? More research is needed to determine.

Nana-nana-nana-nana.

They used to have one of these at Bristol ice rink!

This was one of our favourites. Like real bowling, but less effort!

Some classic pinball.

As with deer hunting, golf is far better in a computer.

Why isn't everyone playing computer games and drinking at 10am on a Tuesday?

Pete's Star Wars.

My Star Wars. After a few ciders, I can't see any difference.

Illegal aliens

Like all good (and several bad) things, our stay in New Mexico had to come to an end. Just to make sure we didn't miss it too much, we went for a hike that consisted of eating sandwiches while sheltering under a tree in a torrential downpour. Flashbacks to my scouting days there.

We decided to break up the long drive home with a night in a hotel and, on the way, a trip to Roswell. For those closed-minded readers who doubt the evidence of their own eyes, Roswell is the place where a UFO crash-landed in July 1947, with multiple unimpeachable accounts of flying discs, otherworldly debris, and little green/grey men wandering about. No one bothered to talk about it until 30 years after it happened, but what more proof do you need of a government cover-up?

The other incontrovertible evidence that this all happened is that Roswell is alien crazy, with every gas station boasting its own painted alien and every shop somehow working an alien into its name/decoration regardless of what it sells.

We decided to go straight to the heart of things, to the International UFO Museum And Research Center. For only a small fee you can pose with a (completely accurate) recreation of the crash and read the detailed timeline about what happened. There are also many displays about sci-fi movies and shows, which I thought took away somewhat from the TRUTH, but fine. Perhaps being a resident alien myself left me a bit touchy.

We celebrated the last night of the holiday with a steak in San Angelo, west Texas, a place that the pandemic seems to have passed by completely; interstellar visitors may be real but apparently viruses aren't, judging by the way vaccination statistics don't quite add up to the people taking no precautions. Whatever - I'm sure the alien tech the US leveraged to make the vaccines is working just fine.

A beautiful walk in the sunshine at Bluff Springs, NM...

...until the rain started coming down. I know the feeling, kid. It builds character.

Visitors have long been coming to New Mexico to enjoy the landscape.

Pete surveys the crash site.

Was "The Day The Earth Stood Still" a documentary?!

Pete attends an alien autopsy.

See? It's THE TRUTH (all capitals).

In a galaxy far, far away.

If cutting up cows is a sign of alien visitation, I've got a prime suspect right here.

Black and white

One of the most amazing sights in New Mexico is White Sands National Park - a huge gypsum deposit in the middle of the Tularosa Basin. Giant ghostly dunes extend for miles in a landscape unlike any other on earth. So of course the American government decided to blow it up! The whole area is designated the White Sands Missile Range, and a little way off is where they exploded the first atomic bomb.

Luckily there were no big bangs on our day walking around it. We decided to try one of the more challenging loop hikes, never intending to go all the way around but just to get off the beaten track, and as temperatures soared we turned our pasty British bodies back for some sand sledging before lunch.

In contrast, a little way north is a huge black smear across the landscape known as the Valley Of Fires. This is somewhat false advertising as no fires are in evidence, instead it's a massive lava deposit from an eruption 5,000 years ago. The ground is folded and fractured with sharp rocks, although a lot of desert plants have made good attempts at putting down roots. There is no sledging here.

On the way back from there we stopped off at the Three Rivers Petroglyph Site, where you can see outstanding prehistoric Jornada Mogollon rock art. That's what the brochure says, but when you're looking at "Bob woz ere 1992" scratched onto a rock it's hard not to be skeptical.

What I can say with certainty is that it's a lot hotter down in the valley than up on the mountain tops. And the age-old solution to that is: more ice cream at Pistachioland.

There are six Cub Scout essentials when hiking. The most important for Pete being "a snack".

Where's Wally?

Carry on up the dune.

The mesmerising landscape.

Hannah of Arabia/New Mexico.

The long walk.

The other White Sands pastime: sand sledging!

Not just for kids.

Although kids have more stamina.

Another day, another landscape. Off into the lava fields!

Taking a walking tour.

Not the most hospitable place.

Fire walking.

You'd think 5,000 years would take some of the edges off.

Me and lava; red hot in our youth, now stiff.

Dragons still live here!

At the Three Rivers Petroglyph site, Pete stares at the landscape.

The landscape stares back!

Some (probably genuine) Jornada Mogollon rock art.

Pete and a petroglyph.

The afternoon storm rolls in. Time to get down from the hills methinks.

And cool off with some ice cream.