It's tricky being of no fixed abode during a global pandemic. The NHS wants nothing to do with us (quite rightly) given we've been absent from their records for 13 years. Flying back to the US seems a little excessive, especially as the beer and chocolate is so much worse there. And Belgium is prioritising...well, the Belgians. If we were going to get a fast-becoming-necessary booster shot, it would have to be a solution as itinerant as us.
And luckily, Brussels has the Vacci-Bus.
I've dealt with a lot of bureaucracy in my life, and the trick is to politely find that one person in the vast lethargic infrastructure who can give you the tiny piece of information you need. Today, Hannah was the one who found it when she spoke to Brussels Coronavirus Call Center (Press 3 for English) and was told "Get to the Vacci-bus!"
Like a demented Anneka Rice, we ran through the streets of Brussels, following clues and seeking out Place Anneessens, where the Vacci-Bus was due to pull in at midday. We got there with three minutes to spare, and joined the ten senior citizens milling around. Suddenly, the bus appeared! Then we had to wait another 45 minutes for the police to arrive and unlock some barriers so it could reverse into the medieval square and prepare to jab us.
My GCSE French was (again) pushed to the limit by trying to discuss the minutiae of vaccine administration, but after flashing our passports and temporary Belgian Numéro d'Identification Sécurité Sociale I got a sticker with a number on it and was told to wait.
Another ten minutes passed before I was called inside. It was...a bus, with some sheets taped to the windows. "Errr. Pfizer. Booster." I said to the nurse, whose questions were far beyond my oral proficiency. I removed five layers of Northern Europe winter clothing, looked away as something was stuck in me, and then Hannah and I waited outside for the required 15 minutes. If that was actually a Pfizer booster, I'll be very relieved.
And...that's it! We're invincible, again, until the next variant comes along. There was hardly anyone at the Vacci-Bus, so if you're experiencing crashing healthcare websites come on over to Belgium and catch the Vacci-Bus like us! I'll buy you a beer and chocolate after, because health is about treating all the needs of a person.
In French, you can get a vaccine chez vous! In Flemish, they naar je toe. I know which I'd prefer.
