"Don't we pay for other people to do that?" I asked Hannah. "Isn't that the point?"
"They're a non-profit!" she told me, with the fiery conviction only someone who works for big oil and buys organic veg can muster.
"I'm a non-profit and no one volunteers to help me," I muttered.
"What was that?"
Which is how I found myself covered in sunscreen and mozzie repellent standing on a small tract of land, sweating buckets in the humidity, tearing up clumps of weeds with my bare hands and hoping that any rattlesnakes had been driven away by the real estate prices. The fire ants were certainly still there, and playfully nipped at my fingers as I deforested their home.
The organisation, called Plant It Forward, has an impressive setup, with four urban farms dotted across Houston, where they harvest a staggering amount of greenery that appears in boxes like ours, as well as farmers' markets and local restaurants. A couple of other victims had turned up to volunteer like us, including one guy who said he was traveling the world with the intent of meeting 10,000 people and writing a book about the most interesting 365. I didn't ask if I made the cut.
I have to confess, after an hour in the searing heat I took Pete off to find a cold lemonade at a nearby coffee shop. As the Godson of a diary farmer, the nephew of another, and the cousin of a third, I'm very used to being the most clueless person on a farm, but had assumed that plants were less hassle than animals. I may have assumed wrong; hand me a milking stool and a set of udders any day. I might also ask Hannah if we can pay double for our box of vegetables from now on, so I can avoid having to do this again.
Half-an-acre of land can produce an incredible amount of greenery for harvest, and an incredible number of weeds for some chump to pull up.
Tiptoeing between the beds.
Meeting the farmer, and getting assigned our tasks.
That's OK Hannah, you just relax in the shade.
Thankfully, child labour is still legal in Texas.
